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Saturday, March 26, 2005
[*help* *help*]
I went to school today for a make-up lecture, since yesterday was Good Friday. I got on the bus, and sat on an aisle seat. A little into the journey, the guy inside alighted, and I moved in. Then this big fat guy came and sat on the aisle seat, where I was originally.
That's all fine and dandy. Well, not really......He was really fat, and he was crushing me! Next came the piledriver up my nose when I realised that he smells like salted fish. I shifted more to the window, and he took it as a signal to move inwards more! Buddy...I'm trying to get away from you, not give you more room to park your jelly-filled stomach. So there I was, caught between a rock and a hard place, with the rock smelling salty to boot. I was so crushed that I couldn't even take out my phone to snap a picture of this guy.
I thought this was probably the worst it could get. I was wrong.
5 minutes later, he started falling asleep. Oh great....As if he wasn't already crushing me to a bloody pulp before just by sitting next to me, he's going to sleep and put his whole body weight on me! Yes, that was what happened. His hand was holding onto the seat in front of him, and I saw with horror as it(yes, "it"') fell with a thud on his tree-trunk-like thigh, and then he started shifting his body weight onto me. Just as I thought this was it, goodbye cruel world, he woke up and gave me a chance to breathe. And then the cycle continued. Crushed....Breathe....Crushed....Breathe....
For a moment I thought I was about to see something real funny when he started leaning towards the aisle instead. There was a lady standing there, talking on her mobile phone. His head must be inches away from her breast. He woke up at the last minute or his head would have been on the breast. I admire the lady. If I were her, I would have pushed his head away.
Anyhow, you always hear about people laughing so hard that they fell off their chair? Well, this guy slept so hard he almost fell off his seat when the bus took a turn. Too bad he caught himself in time. Would have been interesting to see if he bounces up.
Okay, enough about the pile of lard. The bus turned into this junction, just before reaching my secondary school when the driver slammed on the brakes. Hard. Of all the bus rides I've ever taken, I've never experienced a bigger "G-force" than this. A woman in her 40s I think actually fell down because she didn't get a good enough grip. It seemed rather serious, as she kept cradling her arm afterwards and even the driver stopped and went to see how she was doing.
In case you're curious, lard-boy woke up during this episode, but promptly went back to sleep. He needs to conserve his lard.
Finally I reached my stop, and I had to poke him with my finger really hard to wake him up to let me out. Phew.....
On a sad note, one of my black neon tetras died. I found it on my room's floor. Must have jumped out. People commit suicide by jumping into the water. Fishes do it the other way round.
^^^ by Locksley @ 4:41 PM.
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